Funni stories that start in a bar

Birdy

Birdy

In Cryo Sleep
Was talking to the Tbone tonight having a laf at old bar stroies of a wide variety and thought it would be great to share a few.

il start off with my great moment in a gay bar wen i walked into wat i thought was primarily a female loo and saw a random act of kindeness being given on the sink top. There were others watching too who were male which confused me slightly!! needless to say i left as soon as i could.

i think that was the night the barman was wearing less than a thong and i cud not stop looking at his ass!
 
DeZmond

DeZmond

Junior Administrator
I've got one...

Social Outcast and friends walk into a bar... (the Glasgow THN'ers will already be laughing by this point. For everyone else, I'm not going to tell you the rest to keep you in maddening amounts of suspense. It's also to save me from Social Outcast. That's a very powerful reason, don't you know. :p )
 
Tetsuo_Shima

Tetsuo_Shima

In Cryo Sleep
thatbird said:
ive heard alot about this social outcast. and what i have heard i like!!
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Then you must have been hearing complete lies then :p

Ok ok, Ive got one.

So I walk into a bar and go up to the counter. Theres a bunch of psychos wearing straitjackets waiting at the counter and when I approach, they start saying to me 'Thats a nice suit youve got there sir.' and 'I saw your car parked outside, thats quite a ride.'. Slightly perplexed, I walk over to the cigarette machine to purchase some suicide sticks. Just as I go to put in my money, the cigarette machine starts shouting and swearing at me. "F*** off you f***ing w**k! Get back to the ghetto you poor b****rd!". Taken aback, I walk up to the barman to inquire about this odd set of circumstances. "Oh," he says, "The nuts are complimentary but the fag machine's out of order."

Ok, fabricated but at least Im trying :/
 
G

Gopha

In Cryo Sleep
Tetsuo_Shima said:
Then you must have been hearing complete lies then :p

Ok ok, Ive got one.

So I walk into a bar and go up to the counter. Theres a bunch of psychos wearing straitjackets waiting at the counter and when I approach, they start saying to me 'Thats a nice suit youve got there sir.' and 'I saw your car parked outside, thats quite a ride.'. Slightly perplexed, I walk over to the cigarette machine to purchase some suicide sticks. Just as I go to put in my money, the cigarette machine starts shouting and swearing at me. "F*** off you f***ing w**k! Get back to the ghetto you poor b****rd!". Taken aback, I walk up to the barman to inquire about this odd set of circumstances. "Oh," he says, "The nuts are complimentary but the fag machine's out of order."

Ok, fabricated but at least Im trying :/
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Heard it before, still makes me laugh though

thatbloke said:
A man walks into a bar. Ouch
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Theft, Youve been reading the shoutbox!
 
G

Gopha

In Cryo Sleep
Pestcontrol said:
A dyslexic man walks into a bra....
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aaah tis brilliance

If something goes without saying then why say it!

If you dont pay your excorcist, do you get repossesed?

Why do they call the small chocolate bars 'fun sizes' surely it would be more fun to eat a big chocolate bar!
 
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